tempus fugit
by alykel
Summary: some things are just meant to be. JohnElizabeth


**Tempus Fugit**

Looking back on the past few years he still can't believe some of the things that have happened. In just a few years he has seen things, done things, that would be enough to fill several lifetimes. He has arrived at a point where he takes a lot of this for granted. But not everything. He knows what he has and he knows its value. Probably because often enough he was close to losing it. He knows what is important in his life. There is his job. One of the most dangerous, yet also one of the greatest jobs in the world. There are his friends. People who can drive him crazy sometimes. People he knows he can trust with his life. And there is the one person who makes each single day worth living. His best friend. His constant companion.

--

When they first met, there wasn't much opportunity for talk, or for getting to know each other. Right after their arrival they were thrown into one of those life and death situations that seemed to have become quite common by now. They worked together, without rest, to save the city and themselves. And even after the crisis was dealt with, things were still busy. Until at some point, he found himself stepping out on the balcony, seeing her turn around to smile at him and suddenly realized that somewhere along the way they had become friends.

It was a few months later, after they once again had faced some terrible threat and yet again survived, that they were standing side by side on the balcony again. They didn't talk much and he had the feeling that they had only come here to make sure things were fine, that they were both really still around. And it was then that he looked into her eyes and felt time stop. The world around them rushed on, but they were no longer part of it. And when the moment was over he felt like he had spent a lifetime looking into her expressive green eyes, although it had only been a few seconds.

What are a few weeks compared to a lifetime? Why are some days shorter than others? Why can a minute, or even a mere second, sometimes feel like an eternity? Time is relative. Yes. So, does that explain it? It _is_ sort of an explanation, but the one important thing it only implies, but not clearly states is that it might depend on what you spend your time with.

Being stuck on an icy planet, with no way to get to the gate for three days had felt like years to him. The one week he spent in the infirmary afterwards because of mild hypothermia and a terrible cold, with her sitting by his side almost the entire time passed so quickly, it seemed almost like no time to him. But the three days of eternity he had been miserable and alone, the short week in the infirmary he was happy and content, even though he felt quite sick most of the time.

Time went on and lots of things happened. They faced terrible enemies, sometimes they were not sure they would live to see the next day, yet the next day always came. And it always saw them standing side by side. They had come to trust each other, even to rely on each other, different as they were. Their lives in this galaxy had brought with them great responsibilities. Having someone to share the burden was nice. Knowing one could trust that person no matter what was imperative.

The balcony somehow had become theirs. A place where they would meet whenever they needed each other's company. The place was public. For some reason, that was an important fact. But no one would disturb them there. It was their place.

It was after he returned from a mission. The world they had been to had happened to be on the verge of civil war and he had been held hostage for some days, because the people there had wanted weapons from Atlantis. He had been rescued eventually by his team, but for some reason, when he returned, she seemed to be very mad at him and wouldn't talk to him for days. He finally managed to talk to her alone on the balcony. She told him he needed to be more careful on missions. That he should try harder to avoid getting himself into dangerous situations. She seemed really angry. He became angry, too, and told her she had really no idea what it was like out there, and that he certainly hadn't planned on getting captured.

"I came back. I'm alive. What's your problem?" he asked her, anger in his voice.

"What if you hadn't come back?" she said, glaring at him.

And suddenly he understood. Without further thought or argument, he grabbed her head and kissed her. She kissed him back.

They tried to brush it off at first, trying to just be friends again, but it didn't really take them long to see that there was no going back. So they accepted it. During the first months of their relationship they broke up about a hundred times, whenever reason took over or they got into a really bad fight about something. And after a few days they were always back together. He had no choice but to be with her. He needed her, and she needed him.

They would argue sometimes. They were both stubborn. They often disagreed when it came to their view on certain things. Sometimes they would be so mad at each other that they wouldn't talk for more than a day. He would spend the night at his quarters and she at hers and they would both lie awake for hours, trying not to miss each other. Then at some point the next day, they would run into each other somewhere in the city, and he would smile at her and she would smile back at him and the next night they wouldn't be lonely again.

There were many things about their relationship that were complicated. They had agreed to keep it secret. They had to be careful to not show their feelings when others were around. When it had all begun they had been so good at hiding their feelings that Teyla had even asked him whether he and Elizabeth weren't talking anymore, because they had seemed very distanced from each other.

He didn't know how she managed to hide it when he was in danger off world. But from the way she would tightly wrap her arms around him and bury her face in his neck once he was safely home and she came to see him in his quarters, he could tell that it wasn't easy for her. He knew that if she would be the one in danger and he would be the one waiting for her to return, he would go crazy. He prayed that would never happen. He thought he wouldn't be able to deal with the possibility of losing her.

One time they went off world together. She wanted to do some negotiations. On the way back to the gate they walked into an ambush and were forced to fight their way through to the gate. He did everything he could to protect her, yet at some point he thought she had been been hit. He just saw her falling to the ground beside him. For a moment, his heart stopped. But she had only tripped and she got up again and they made it home safely. That night as they were back in her quarters, he hugged her tightly and then looked deep into her eyes as he said "I love you." He meant it. She smiled happily, a smile that lit up her whole face and said "I love you, too."

It felt right to say it. They both knew it was true. It was the voicing of something they had told each other so many times in silence, a promise that had been present in every touch. But they could say it now. They weren't afraid anymore of what it meant. Wherever it would lead them, it was the only way for them to go.

They didn't break up anymore since then. It didn't get easier, but not being together was just not an option.

He sometimes wondered how he had been able to change so much. Spending so much time with the same person, that was something he hadn't thought he was capable of. He had never exactly been the kind of guy for long term relationships and commitment. But with her, that was the way it had to be. It felt like being with her was the most natural thing in the world. He didn't want to run, he didn't want to hide anymore. And he wouldn't be able to hide from her, anyway, even if he tried. She knew him. Just as he knew her. And it didn't scare him, because it was her. He had never allowed anyone else to get so close to him. No one else had ever been able to look right into his soul with just a glance. She did it naturally.

After one of their more serious arguments about something he couldn't even remember anymore, he was lying on his bed in his quarters, trying so hard to be mad at her, to not want her by his side right now. And suddenly he couldn't take it anymore. So he got up, walked over to her quarters and as soon as she opened the door just pulled her into a fierce hug, pressing his head against her hair. After a little moment of hesitation she gave in and hugged him back. "I love you." he said. She pulled back a little and he saw the question in her eyes as she asked "But why?"

He thought about it for a few seconds. It wasn't her beauty. She was without doubt one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. But there was so much more about her. She was smart. He was always impressed by how intelligent she was. But she could lose her mind tomorrow and it wouldn't make him stop loving her. It wasn't the way she made him feel. He enjoyed being near her, needed it just like air and water. But even if he was light-years away from her and didn't see her for weeks, he still loved her. There were many things he loved _about_ her, but they weren't the reason for loving her. He realized that maybe love didn't need a reason. "Because I do." he said. And she understood.

The world was a crazy place sometimes. They made some more allies and some more enemies, there were always battles to be fought, treaties to be arranged, decisions to be made. The names and faces of some of the enemies changed, and some remained the same. Every day brought along some new challenge, problems arose and were solved and new problems emerged. And like this it would go on, forever. The world would keep changing around them as time went by, and they would deal with it.

--

He is amazed at how their relationship has changed over the time, how it is still changing. How he can still discover new things about her, how he still falls in love with her over and over again, every day a little more. Things often tend to get a little insane in the world around them, everything is happening so fast, and sometimes all they can do is hold on to each other, watching the world racing by, trying to keep up with it. They always manage.

Waking up in his bed and feeling her stir beside him, he turns around to place a soft kiss on her forehead. "Good morning." he says. "Good morning." she replies, moving closer to him to rest her head on his shoulder. He wraps his arms around her and is happy. Time will go on and bring about many changes. But some things will never change, because they are meant to be. Until the end of time.


End file.
